A Year in Review with Michél + fundraising and support asks
Originally distributed via newsletter on December 21, 2022
Hello friends,
Happy holidays to all who celebrate and to all a restful, rejuvenating, and revelatory close to the year.
I am so grateful to all who’ve been following along and to those who have only recently joined this newsletter welcome and thank you as well.
I’m most proud that I’ve stuck to what I said it would be, an infrequent but honest and personal reflection point. I feel I’ve done that and hopefully, you agree.
This final newsletter of 2022 is a LONG one. I’ll dive into what I’ve learned in my first year of consulting and some takeaways and it closes out with a long list of fundraising asks for some personally inspiring organizations or initiatives that I know would love some support right now. Your help pitching in and sharing around will be very helpful, thank you! Even if you wanna just cut and paste just the fundraising asks part that is cool. Edit away.
I also want to hear from y’all so let’s try this quick survey of your thoughts on this newsletter so I can finally start being more representative of what you, the reader, want to see in your inbox.
Thank you again for being a part of this journey that has felt so scary at times but having this outlet to unpack the road to independent consulting has been such a boon to my spirit. You following along and sharing back your thoughts, reflections, and sometimes even disagreements have been super helpful,
Michél
In my first year as an independent consultant I chose to prioritize rest and spaciousness over jumping right into another grind-heavy setup for the sake of making more money and having more clients.
Here’s what I’ve learned over the past year in hopes some or all of it could be helpful for you, and for those thinking about consulting or striking out on your own, here’s what to keep in mind. To ensure I’m being transparent and honest about the range of experience let’s start with some of the moments and concepts I struggled the most with.
One of the biggest themes was unlearning. This concept has been part of my life thanks to a great friend and mentor who passed earlier this year, Hnin. Hnin was the executive director of CoFed and we spent much of our time commiserating about the hardships of being folks of color in a majority-white nonprofit world. We struggled with imposter syndrome, the weirdness of fundraising, wealth and lack thereof, and so much more. Back in the day, Hnin and CoFed put out this unlearning newsletter for racial justice and equity and I randomly responded to one of those newsletters. Hnin followed back up with me that week and we started having regular calls about unlearning curriculums for nonprofit staff, that is both the start of my friendship and the start of my grappling with this concept of unlearning. I can’t stop thinking about how much Hnin has helped me through to this point and even after their passing, I have unlocked so many of their lessons from my memory. I think this focus on unlearning is so important because too much of our system relies on us achieving comprehension over compassion as Alok Menon so brilliantly identifies. In order to achieve compassion we have to unpack what parts within ourselves continue to prolong the systems of harm and keep us from finding proximity to those around us, the ways that the systems spur some negative emotions and feelings within us that can trickle into how we impact people in our lives.
As you could probably expect the hardest point of unlearning for me was money, my relationship with it, and how I used it. Honestly, a lot of my anxiety last year centered around money. Every aspect from taxes, bills, and spending money vs necessary money. All of it had this special ability to trigger financial trauma from my experience as someone who had varying levels of poverty most of my life. The first thing I realized and had to grapple with was that I no longer had an organization or institution that handled every aspect of my needs via my salary. My taxes were taken out for me, healthcare, social security, etc. all of that was already set. But now I had to be better at putting aside money for tax payments, setting up my budget for what I needed vs wanted vs savings. For instance, the practice of moving money around between different accounts to pay for things here and save things over here was totally fine. It was actually everything I planned for. But each pay cycle became an exercise in confronting my anxieties with handling and understanding how resources worked for me and not necessarily so stringently the other way. (me working for the money)
*Learning sidebar* For new consultants be sure to look into how much taxes you need to be taking out each month, and set aside that amount in an account just for taxes. Move money to your spending account for personal use and have a set amount you contribute to savings. Especially for folks that don’t come from wealth 60%+ Americans don’t have enough money to cover a $500 medical emergency. At least work to be better than that. Don’t worry about moving money around to cover rent, bills, etc. But make sure you put that money back swiftly and with discipline.
Unlearning as a practice also extended to how I valued myself. I struggled at times to understand my worth since so much of my value has come from the output and victories I could achieve for campaigns. Generally, so much of your worth and value is derived from what you can do for other people. That hasn’t changed but now I have deliverables and timelines that operate much differently. I also work based on other people's pace, capacity, and abilities. Sometimes I’d feel bad for being done with that day's work at 2 pm even though I knew I was waiting on this person for a review, I hadn’t heard back from this other person and literally couldn’t move work forward. So it was fine to walk for my afternoon coffee and treats or to go grab lunch on time. A habit I hadn’t done a good job of building out in my life prior. That unlearning also made room to learn that sometimes my value was in my feedback, my expertise, or my experience and connections. It wasn’t always a formulaic approach like input+output=value to a client. It was sometimes that, but it also wasn’t primarily that. I sometimes found myself feeling dumb or needing to remember that the money folks are spending on me is no different than when I was in a salaried position and had ebbs and flows of output or impact. I got paid all the same. Other times my read of value was drastically different from that of a client. As with the imposter’s syndrome of old, I felt as though I was not nearly as positively viewed as they felt at the end of things.
I guess that last point is connected to the next topic I wanted to share. Burnout is a hell of a thing. Recovering from it took far longer than expected. My brain fog, intellectual stamina, and ability to recall phrases, words, or insights were all and continue to be extremely negatively impacted by my burnout. I thought I’d have a few months until I could hit the ground running again, but no burnout gave me none of that expediency. One year later and still I’m figuring out how to move forward. I feel more ready than ever for new ventures in the new year but cautiously and with a priority on my health.
Some of the tertiary effects of burnout were made a bit worse when dealing with how lonely an endeavor freelance can be. I found myself missing the supervisor check-ins, team meetings, collaborative strategy calls, and so much of what being on a team means. Much of the past year has been unlearning the dangerous level of reliance on these systems of camaraderie while learning what I actually need to do this work. Sometimes it does mean I go it alone and learn to be confident in myself again. I still don’t think I’ve quite figured out the balancing act but I have built around me the systems of support to counter that feeling of loneliness in this work while knowing what I could rely on myself for.
The last thing I confirmed is that my brain works when it wants to work. Sometimes that means 11 am -1 pm then 5-8 pm shifts and then other times it’s a purely creative hour before I have to crawl back into bed, or sometimes it's a straight no-go (winter). Either way, my greatest joy is allowing my brain and body to flow to match what they're built for.
That last one squarely sets me up to share the ways my consulting business brought me joy. I am in complete euphoria because I get to work with some of the most amazing people, that includes clients, fellow consultants, and beyond. As I mentioned above, consulting can be pretty lonely, that’s why I’ve started building an informal team infrastructure to fill what I was missing, and find those moments for affirmations, commiserations, and celebrations! It’s meant partnering with one of my fave peeps on collaborative projects more formally, Kelly Baker you the homie! It’s also meant less formal check-ins and catchups with lovely folks like Tianna Arrendodo and Grace Anderson, and a few more folks who cooking up some stuff so I won’t mention to avoid ruining their own launches and announcements. That’s also meant maintaining a little circle of fellow consultants to tap in with and regularly keeping up to date on the work they're doing and what they’re looking for to help support one another with opportunities and exciting points of collaboration. These folks have helped me breathe so deeply in moments when I was a bit stifled by my own anxiety and worry.
In consulting it's really about building constantly. Not in a laborious way but in a way that maintains your community of people, clients, collaborators, and sources, to keep you energized but also grounded. It means getting better organized in ways you didn’t think about before. Got a receipt from a purchase – um save that you might need it for tax season (scan it so the letters disappearing won’t hurt ya later, et cetera et cetera. It also means you need to budget better, if you have strong habits of budgeting as you grow and scale you’re better for it, and if you decide to stay the same or downsize even better.
You’ve also got an exciting opportunity to tap into those networks and I highly recommend continuing to network and support your people that align with the work you want to be doing. Also, be smart about your networking – there’s no need to force it. If work doesn’t align or you aren’t the right fit it’s ok. Sometimes the doors that move the easiest when pushed are the ones you should prioritize busting through. There are those moments you might have to force something open but I’ve found those aren’t good for your spirit and end up not being good for your business either.
The final thing that I’d share that has been a great value to me is to spend time DREAMING. It doesn’t matter where you are in your life or career, making a list and spending time reminding yourself and further, speaking into existence what you want to be doing, gets us excited, all those good feelings help us find our way there – I’m a big believer in that. Make a list of ideal clients or realms of work you want to be in. Name the skills you wish you had and spend some time finding the discreet or big commitment programs that help you learn them. It really doesn’t matter how you do it, but do it so you can better incorporate it into your plans. If it never makes its way out of your head, on paper, in plans, in exploratory calls, as part of your introductions it’ll continue to exist in only your head alone. Maybe limit it to your co-conspirators if you’re worried about jinxing stuff, but seriously consider taking every little step you can to realize the dreaming of your life.
As I close out the year I wanted to share the things I think y’all should fund and get others to fund, things to check out either cause you should be there or you might find it cool, and spaces to follow for your socials. Next year I’ll share some exciting announcements and other projects I’ve been excited about.
Thanks again as always for reading along, please be sure to take the reader’s feedback survey and take as many of the asks as you can (share around to your networks!)
Michél
FUND THESE:
Power Shift Network
Full disclosure I’m the board chair of PSN, but more than that, I’m a big fan of this crew. Black-led, conscientious thoughtful staff covering the spectrum of identities from neurodivergence to queerness. I literally want nothing more than for PSN to be funded in full for years to come, and you should too.
Donate here and consider doubling your impact through employer matches
The Climate Mobilization
Full disclosure, I am also on the board of The Climate Mobilization. They are in the midst of an organizational transformation to center climate resilience and movement-wide trainings, support, and alignment around a more healthy climate movement.
LittleSustainers for LittleSis
LittleSis are the brains behind campaigning. I love them because they provide infrastructure, trainings, and the know-how research to stop the powerful and elite that are destroying our planet. They’re asking folks to join as monthly donors and only need a dozen more to reach their goal
Supporting Climate Museum
Climate Museum is the only museum of its kind, igniting our hearts through art, inspiring us to change our perception of collective power, and moving us to action all through a curatorial museum approach. I recently had the honor of organizing a couple of groups to visit and I am completely sold on the need for this one-of-a-kind approach. Chip in to keep their new beautiful space in SoHo and offer FREE programming for folks that walk through the door. Have you ever seen a dozen elementary kids fired up to make a tiktok dance to combat climate change – I hadn’t before the crew that left their tour of the Climate Museum on a cold day in December.
Matt Garza and Haus of Glitter
I went to Haus of Glitters incredible live performances at House of Yes in New York back in October. It was beautiful and emotional and a brilliant display of Black, queer liberation.
I encourage you to check out their website for all the information and background but here’s how you can support:
SEND OUR PATREON to folks in your network who believe in creative justice
EMAIL US if you know of an empty house or free/subsidized housing this winter
BUY OUR MERCH as gifts for friends and family at www.hausofglitter.org/support
SIGN OUR PETITION at HealEsekHopkins.com + wear our shirt + spread the word
CONNECT US with folks across the nation + globe who might be interested in bringing The Haus of Glitter to host a workshop, artist talk, retreat, residency or performance
Corporate Accountability
I hate abusive transnational corporations with a passion and I LOVE Corporate Accountability. Consider making a contribution to this kick-ass organization that challenges corporate power and moves people to seize the opportunity to act that keeps these corporations accountable, liable, and defends against those that do their bidding. Monthly donations are a great way to support them or chip in here
ACRE
ACRE has long been the organization helping move movements to the left and ensuring people on the frontlines of impact are the ones centered. Donate here
Worth Rises
Worth Rises is an organization committed to dismantling the prison industry and has been leading the charge on free phone calls for incarcerated folks and their families. Also helped get fully abolishing slavery once and for all on the ballot in states across the US. Check ‘em out, learn more, and donate
CHECK THIS OUT:
Tiana Arrendodo website, for consulting and for beautiful self-healing decks
Carmack Collective Announcement (New fund announcement)
Mary Heglar on Burnout in the Cut
FAVES FROM INSTA:
@power_shift
Power Shift Network
@littlesisgram
Little Sis
@_artcoop
@Economic Left
@Upstreampodcast
@BrownGirlGreen
@stopcorporateabuse
@neweconomycoalition
@nohourworkweek
Self-promotion, my podcast’s insta @uponrequestpod
